NIU and the value of remembrance

Three years after the NIU shootings, I heard some sentiment today that it’s time for the university, and the Northern Star, to scale back on these yearly remembrances and move forward.


Agreed. But I think sometimes in our desire to put an awful event behind us, we forget about the value of remembering, and teaching future generations.

Several thousand students, faculty, staff and community members gathered for a brief memorial ceremony this afternoon outside Cole Hall. With the building finally undergoing renovations and a facelift after sitting empty for three years since the shootings, President John Peters remarked that the construction signals “a sense of renewal and a resolve to move forward.”

Before the procession, I heard groups of students talking quietly about where they were when the shootings happened, and what they experienced. Other, younger students stood respectfully and quietly. For a supposedly narcissistic generation that cares little about history, these were good moments.

At the Northern Star today, a framed photo of shooting victim Dan Parmenter and a bouquet of flowers graced a table near the advertising department, where Dan worked. It was an ordinary day, but the reminder was front and center. Uncomfortable, but right.

Before the ceremony outside Cole, a student who was wounded in the shootings stopped by the Star to say hello. He had ended up being a Star reporter last year, right before he graduated, and always impressed me as someone who had made peace with the whole experience. He works in another state now but wanted to be here today for the ceremony. To him, there’s value in taking time to remember what happened. Not to wallow in it, but to acknowledge its significance. That strikes me as a healthy approach.

Several other Northern Star students, past and present, were in that Cole classroom when the shootings happened. They’ve spoken, both publicly and privately, about how surviving that day gave renewed meaning to how they want to live their lives.

It’s not about reliving the terrible, vivid memories so many of us have. It’s simply about taking a few moments, once a year, to remember. Yet, I can understand why some student journalists who have been here for four years experienced a relapse in recent days of what experts call “event fatigue.” For them, these stories require a lot more than a few moments.

“I cannot wait to not write about this any more,” one reporter told me this afternoon.

We both understood that sentiment. The reality is, though, that she probably will, in one form or another. Feb. 14, 2008, does not define any of us at NIU, but it is forever a part of us all.

And it’s OK to be OK with that.